Kicking Habits

Summary

In this conversation, Amiee Kate Speakman, a mindset and wellness coach, shares her journey of taking a break from alcohol and the positive impact it has had on her life.

The conversation covers topics such as the tipping point that led to her decision, the increase in alcohol intake during the pandemic, the role of alcohol in socializing, and the challenges of parenting a small child while drinking.

Amiee also discusses the resources she used to educate herself about alcohol & her drinking behaviours, including books and podcasts.

She shares strategies for coping with cravings and temptations, as well as the benefits she has experienced since quitting alcohol, such as improved sleep and overall health.

The conversation concludes with a discussion on mindset and the importance of embracing yourself and making mindful choices around sugar.

In this conversation, Carol and Aimee discuss the importance of mindset and self-talk in overcoming challenges related to alcohol and personal development.

They explore the power of subconscious thinking and beliefs, as well as the need to question and challenge negative thoughts.

They also emphasize the significance of adding positive elements to counteract negative thinking and the value of movement and physical activity in improving mental well-being.

The conversation highlights the importance of taking small steps, being kind to yourself, and celebrating milestones along the journey of taking back control of your drinking.

They also discuss the role of reflection and preparation in overcoming triggers and building a personal toolkit for coping.

Takeaways

Taking a break from alcohol can have a positive impact on sleep, energy levels, mood, and overall health and wellness.

Educating yourself through books, podcasts, and online communities can provide valuable support and guidance.

Finding non-alcoholic drink alternatives can help with cravings and provide a sense of normalcy in social situations.

Mindset plays a crucial role in rewiring thought patterns and coping with triggers and cravings.

Making mindful choices around sugar can contribute to overall well-being.

Mindset and self-talk play a crucial role in overcoming challenges related to alcohol and personal development.

Questioning and challenging negative thoughts is essential for changing patterns of thinking.

Adding positive elements, such as affirmations and physical activity, can counteract negative thinking and improve mental well-being.

Taking small steps, being kind to yourself, and celebrating milestones are important aspects of the journey to alcohol control and personal growth.

Sound Bites

"I was probably spending £400 a month on wine from the wine club."

"Alcohol is readily accessible, isn't it? We all use it to self-medicate don't we?"

"Alcohol is a toxic substance, it's actually carcinogenic."

Keywords

autism, coping mechanism, education, drinking habits, root causes, mindset, faith, alternatives to alcohol, support, sobriety

Summary

In this conversation, Carol shares her personal journey with alcohol and how it was influenced by her son's autism diagnosis.

She discusses how she used alcohol as a coping mechanism and the challenges she faced in her son's education.

Carol emphasizes the importance of understanding the reasons behind our drinking habits and the need to address the root causes.

She also highlights the power of mindset and the role of faith in overcoming habitual habits & behaviours.

Carol provides practical tips for finding alternatives to alcohol and seeking support on the journey to moderation or taking a break from drinking.

Takeaways

Using alcohol as a coping mechanism for stress and challenges can lead to a slippery slope of relying on alcohol.

Understanding the root causes of our drinking habits is crucial for long-term change.

Mindset work and addressing the emotional reasons behind drinking are essential for breaking free from our habitual drinking habits.

Finding alternatives to alcohol and seeking support from coaches or communities can aid in the journey to controlling your drinking.

Leaning on faith and drawing strength from God can provide comfort and guidance in difficult times.

LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

William Porter’s website with links for his books.

Summary

In part 2 of this episode, Carol discusses the Christian perspective on changing behaviour and overcoming habitual drinking.

She emphasizes the importance of addressing the root of the problem rather than focusing on behaviour modification.

Carol uses the analogy of removing the roots of a passionflower to illustrate the need for deep change.

She highlights the role of belief systems and neural pathways in forming habits and suggests that spiritual transformation can lead to lasting change.

Carol also encourages listeners to draw strength from the Holy Spirit and seek support from other Christians.

She concludes with a prayer for victory over habitual habits.

Takeaways

Changing behaviour requires addressing the root of the problem, not just modifying behaviour.

Belief systems and neural pathways play a significant role in forming habits.

Spiritual transformation can lead to lasting change.

Drawing strength from the Holy Spirit and seeking support from other Christians is essential in overcoming habitual drinking.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Recap

01:23 The Difficulty of Changing Behaviour

04:27 Changing Neural Pathways

06:01 Spiritual Transformation

07:12 Drawing Strength from the Holy Spirit

08:15 Defining and Breaking Habits

10:04 Identifying Triggers

11:22 Seeking Support from Other Christians

13:05 Alcohol as a False God

14:37 Taking Control and Seeking God's Help

16:20 God's Power Over Habits

PLEASE NOTE MY CHRISTIAN TAKE ON THIS EPISODE WILL BE DELIVERED IN PART 2. (A SEPERATE RECORDING) PLEASE CHECK BACK SOON TO LISTEN IN. 🙏

Summary

In this conversation, Carol discusses various topics related to mindset and behavioural change.

She provides a personal update and shares her son's assessment and university plans.

Carol emphasizes the importance of getting out and socializing, especially for young people.

She then delves into the power of mindset and the need to change our thinking at its root cause.

She discusses the influence of perspective, self-talk, and negative thinking on her first marriage and mental health.

Carol also highlights the impact of thoughts on physical well-being and the misconceptions surrounding alcohol's effects.

She concludes by offering solutions and strategies for changing mindset and taking control.

Takeaways

Getting out and socializing is important for mental well-being, especially for young people.

Changing behaviour isn't the answer it requires addressing the root cause and mindset.

Negative thinking and self-talk can have a significant impact on relationships and mental health.

Positive thinking and belief systems can lead to positive changes in our drinking patterns and our well-being.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Personal Update

02:27 Son's Assessment and University Plans

03:54 The Importance of Getting Out and Socializing

04:24 Focus on Mindset and Changing Behaviour

08:13 The Power of Mindset and Thoughts

09:41 The Influence of Perspective and Self-Talk

11:43 Negative Thinking and Its Impact on Relationships

14:07 Negative Self-Talk and Depression

21:55 The Power of Positive Thinking

23:07 The Misconception of Alcohol's Effects

27:02 The Importance of Self-Talk and Belief Systems

29:51 Changing Mindset and Taking Control

30:48 Digging Deeper to Address Root Causes

33:19 Offering Solutions and Strategies

34:19 The Power of the Mind to Physically Change the Body

I offer a £99 Exploratory Call to anyone who would like to make changes around their drinking patterns & behaviours. As it’s my second business anniversary I am offering 50% off my Exploratory Calls in March so check out the link to get booked in!

This is a call where we look at your habits & you leave the call with a minimum of 3 tips/strategies or techniques to make the changes you are finding a challenge.

Summary

Tracy shares her journey of growing up with alcohol in the family and the embarrassment she felt as a child.

She discusses her own drinking habits, starting with cider at parties and later binge drinking in her 30s.

Tracy explains how the decision to stop drinking was influenced by her desire to have a different experience for her own child.

She talks about the challenges of peer pressure and the reactions she received from friends and family when she stopped drinking.

Tracy also discusses the changing attitudes towards non-alcoholic drinks and the importance of finding alternatives in social settings.

In this conversation, Tracy and Carol discuss their experiences with alcohol and the benefits of quitting drinking.

They talk about the peer pressure and social acceptance of alcohol, as well as the challenges of changing drinking habits.

Tracy shares how quitting alcohol has improved her sleep, weight, and overall well-being.

They also discuss the impact of alcohol on relationships and the importance of having a supportive circle of friends.

Tracy speaks about her business, which supports people with dementia, inspired by her mother's diagnosis and sad passing.

Overall, the conversation highlights the personal and societal effects of alcohol and the positive changes that can come from quitting.

Takeaways

Growing up with alcohol in the family can have a lasting impact on a person's relationship with alcohol.

Peer pressure can be a significant factor in drinking habits, but it is possible to resist and make different choices.

Changing attitudes towards non-alcoholic drinks are making it easier for people to socialize without alcohol.

Stopping drinking can lead to positive changes in relationships and personal well-being. Quitting alcohol can lead to improved sleep, weight loss, and a clear head.

Changing drinking habits can be challenging, especially when faced with peer pressure and social acceptance of alcohol.

Having a supportive circle of friends and changing friendship groups can make quitting alcohol easier.

Alcohol can have a negative impact on relationships, and quitting can lead to improved partnerships.

Educating yourself about the dangers of alcohol and giving people a choice can help promote healthier habits.

Summary

In this conversation, Carol discusses the power of mindset and how it affects our behaviour, specifically in relation to our drinking habits.

She emphasizes the importance of being aware of our thoughts and the influence they have on our feelings and actions.

Carol shares her personal experience of how negative thoughts can lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as drinking.

She encourages listeners to challenge their thoughts and make intentional choices to change their behaviour.

(Carol covers a short spiritual section at the end of her show for the Christian women that follow her).

Takeaways

Our thoughts have a significant impact on our behaviour and choices.

Negative thoughts can lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as drinking.

By challenging our thoughts and making intentional choices, we can change our behaviour.

Renewing the mind through spirituality can provide strength and guidance in overcoming challenges.

Chapters

00:00 The Power of Mindset

02:10 Negative Thoughts and Behaviour

04:06 Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions

05:06 The Choice to Change

07:55 Influences on Thoughts

09:24 Challenges and Choices

10:22 Being Intentional with Attention

11:41 Making Choices a Practice

12:37 Changing Behaviour through Thoughts

13:58 Understanding Cravings

15:20 Controlling Thoughts and Choices

16:17 Renewing the Mind

I offer a £99 Exploratory Call to anyone (Christian or not) who would like to make changes around their drinking patterns & behaviours.

This is a one off call where we look at your habits & you leave the call with a minimum of 3 tips/strategies or techniques to make the changes you are finding a challenge.

PLEASE NOTE AS PART OF MY BUSINESS BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS ALL EXPLORATORY CALLS ARE HALF PRICE FOR THE MONTH OF MARCH. ONLY £49.50.

Summary

In this episode, Carol discusses confirmation bias and its impact on our beliefs about alcohol.

She starts by sharing her recent experiences and introduces the concept of confirmation bias.

Carol explains how confirmation bias influences our decision-making and provides examples related to beliefs about red wine and alcohol's effects on sleep.

She also discusses the role of critical thinking and adjusting beliefs based on new information.

This is the first episode where Carol starts to share her Christian perspective and offers scripture and prayer for Christian women struggling with drinking habits.

She encourages listeners to explore alternative ideas about alcohol and seek support in their journey.

Takeaways

Confirmation bias is the tendency to seek out and interpret information that confirms our existing beliefs.

Confirmation bias can influence our decision-making and hinder critical thinking.

It is important to be open to adjusting our beliefs based on new information and to consider alternative perspectives.

For Christian women, seeking guidance from scripture and prayer can provide strength and support in overcoming drinking habits.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Recap

01:29 Introduction to Confirmation Bias

04:23 Confirmation Bias in Research

05:54 Confirmation Bias and Beliefs about Alcohol and Sleep

07:24 Confirmation Bias and Justifying Drinking

10:39 Critical Thinking and Adjusting Beliefs

13:01 Confirmation Bias and Questioning Drinking Habits

15:48 Christian Perspective on Confirmation Bias

16:04 Scripture and Prayer for Christian Women

26:05 Conclusion and Call to Action

I offer a £99 Exploratory Call to anyone who would like to make changes around their drinking patterns & behaviours.

This is a one off call where we look at your habits & you leave the call with a minimum of 3 tips/strategies or techniques to make the changes you are finding a challenge.

Summary

In this conversation, Carol discusses the changes she has made to her coaching practice, specifically focusing on her Christian faith.

She shares her personal journey with Christianity and how it has influenced her coaching approach.

Carol emphasizes the importance of faith and spirituality in coaching and how it can provide an extra dimension for clients.

She clarifies that while her coaching is tailored for Christian women, her Exploratory Call is open to all women with or without a belief.

Carol also mentions her intention to include scripture and prayer at the end of her podcast episodes.

Takeaways

Faith and spirituality can play a significant role in coaching, providing an extra dimension for clients.

Coaching specifically for Christian women allows for the incorporation of scripture and prayer in the coaching process.

Carol Exploratory Call is unchanged and open to all women not just Christian women.

Carol plans to include scripture and a short prayer at the end of her podcast episodes for those interested in the spiritual aspect.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Background

03:23 The Importance of Faith

06:14 Coaching for Christian Women

09:08 Exploratory Call for All Women

11:03 Incorporating Scripture and Prayer

12:30 Conclusion and Call to Action

Please do leave me a review if you have enjoyed the episode.

Summary

In this conversation, Carol interviews Dani Wallace, a public speaking coach and founder of the Fly Anyway Foundation, about her relationship with alcohol and her decision to stop drinking.

Danny shares how her life has changed since giving up alcohol, including improved clarity of thought and reduced anxiety.

They discuss the impact of drinking on productivity and business success, as well as strategies for socializing without alcohol.

Dani also highlights the need for more appealing non-alcoholic alternatives and the shifting social culture around drinking.

Finally, they explore the connection between creativity and drinking, with Danny sharing her personal experience.

In this conversation, Carol and The Queen Bee Dani discuss the relationship between creativity and sobriety, the fallout of drinking, the use of substances by artists, the journey of taking breaks from drinking, experiencing homelessness, taking responsibility for change, being present and curious, advice for taking a break from drinking, personal development, and The Fly Anyway Foundation.

Takeaways

Giving up alcohol can lead to improved clarity of thought and reduced anxiety.

Drinking can negatively impact productivity and hinder business success.

Finding alternative activities and non-alcoholic drinks can help in social situations.

The social culture around drinking is changing, with a growing market for non-alcoholic alternatives.

The relationship between creativity and drinking varies for different individuals. Accessing creativity can be done both in sobriety and while drinking, but sobriety allows for a clearer and more consistent access to creativity.

The fallout of drinking, such as feeling apathetic and anxious the next day, can hinder the ability to access creativity.

Artists may use substances as part of their creative process, but sobriety can lead to a deeper and more authentic form of creativity.

Taking breaks from drinking can involve extended periods of sobriety, but there may be instances where drinking occurs again before realizing the need for change.

Experiencing homelessness can be a result of poor decisions and circumstances, but taking responsibility and making positive changes can lead to a better future.

Being present and curious can enhance social interactions and lead to more meaningful conversations.

When considering taking a break from drinking, it is important to give yourself grace and shift the mindset from giving up something to being free from negative experiences.

Personal development and self-improvement can play a significant role in overcoming challenges and achieving success.

The Fly Anyway Foundation aims to help individuals who have experienced domestic abuse build businesses and regain autonomy.

The conversation highlights the importance of self-awareness, taking intentional action, and embracing personal growth in order to make positive changes in your life.

Please do leave me a review if you have enjoyed the episode. Here are Dani’s links:

Big Festoon in March

In this conversation, Carol discusses alcohol with Nick James, the founder of Expert Empires. They explore the impact of upbringing on alcohol habits, the cultural influence of alcohol, and the relationship between alcohol and entrepreneurship.

Nick shares his personal journey with alcohol, including his decision to take a year-long break from drinking. He emphasizes the importance of accountability and support in making positive changes. Nick also discusses the challenges and benefits of abstaining from alcohol and the need for occasional resets.

In this conversation, Nick James discusses his experience of being alcohol-free for a year and the benefits it brought him. He talks about enjoying the lockdown period and spending quality time with his family. Nick also shares the decision-making process and finding a replacement for alcohol.

The biggest benefits he experienced were having more time, energy, and clarity of mind.

Takeaways

•  Upbringing and cultural influence play a significant role in alcohol habits.

• Alcohol can be used as a form of escapism and can impact relationships and entrepreneurship.

• Taking a break from alcohol can lead to improved health, relationships, and personal growth.

• Accountability and support are crucial in making positive changes.

• Occasional resets and intentional choices can help maintain a healthy relationship with alcohol.

• Enjoying the lockdown period and spending quality time with family can be a positive experience.

• Making the decision to quit drinking and finding a replacement that is enjoyable are key factors in successfully becoming alcohol-free.

• Being alcohol-free can lead to having more time, energy, and mental clarity.

Chapters

 00:00 Introduction and Upbringing

03:02 Teenage Drinking and Cultural Influence

08:06 Parental Influence and Trust

10:13 Alcohol and Entrepreneurship

12:26 Alcohol as Escapism

15:11 Alcohol's Impact on Health and Relationships

18:42 Taking a Break from Alcohol

19:22 Accountability and Support

22:12 Committing to a Year Without Alcohol

26:26 Testing Willpower and Making Choices

29:15 Slippery Slope and Future Resets

31:23 Ease of Decision and Replacements

33:44 Enjoying the Lockdown

34:35 Making the Decision to Quit Drinking

35:12 The Benefits of Being Alcohol-Free

36:39 Clarity and Mental Well-being

37:27 Empire Builders Podcast

Want to get in touch with Carol?

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Summary

In this conversation, Carol discusses the pressures of Christmas and the societal conditioning around alcohol. She shares her experience running alcohol-free experiments and the benefits of coaching as a safe space for individuals to open up. Carol emphasizes the importance of speaking out and taking time for yourself, as well as understanding the underlying reasons for drinking. She explores the effects of alcohol on health, particularly during menopause, and recommends resources for further reading. Carol also highlights the need to address emotional turmoil and find alternative coping mechanisms. She concludes by encouraging listeners to make informed choices and have a more enjoyable and mindful Christmas.

Takeaways

Christmas can be a challenging time due to societal pressures and conditioning around alcohol. It is important to find alternatives and create a more enjoyable and mindful holiday season.

Coaching provides a safe space for individuals to open up and address their drinking habits. It allows for non-judgmental support and helps individuals understand the underlying reasons for their drinking.

Alcohol has negative effects on health, including disrupting sleep, worsening menopause symptoms, and impacting mental health. Educating yourself about these effects can help in making informed choices.

Finding alternative coping mechanisms and addressing underlying emotional issues is crucial in changing drinking habits. It is important to seek support and explore different approaches to personal growth and well-being.

Taking time for yourself, practicing self-reflection, and finding answers within can lead to personal growth and a more fulfilling life without alcohol.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Christmas Preparations

01:08 Running Alcohol-Free Experiments

02:40 The Benefits of Coaching and Creating a Safe Space

03:38 The Importance of Speaking Out and Taking Time for Yourself

06:03 Societal Pressure and Conditioning Around Alcohol

07:29 Alcohol as a Coping Mechanism

08:36 The Effects of Alcohol on Health and Well-being

09:36 The Role of Education and Awareness in Changing Drinking Habits

11:32 Understanding the Reasons for Drinking and Finding Alternatives

13:51 The Impact of Alcohol on Menopause Symptoms

14:13 Recommendations for Further Reading and Resources

16:38 Exploring Different Approaches to Addressing Alcohol Issues

17:16 Understanding the Underlying Issues Behind Alcohol Use

20:30 Alcohol's Effect on the Brain and Dopamine Levels

22:19 Creating a More Enjoyable Christmas with Alcohol-Free Alternatives

23:16 Reflecting on Past Christmases and the Impact of Alcohol

24:29 Personal Growth and Coping Mechanisms Without Alcohol

25:52 Dealing with Mental Health Issues and Finding Support

26:44 Finding Alternative Ways to Cope and Seek Support

28:22 Encouraging the Use of Alcohol-Free Alternatives

29:41 The Benefits of Choosing Non-Alcoholic Options

31:51 Navigating Social Situations and Dealing with Peer Pressure

33:18 The Growing Trend of People Choosing Not to Drink

36:36 Moving Beyond Behavioural Change and Addressing Underlying Issues

40:36 Educating and Empowering Individuals to Make Informed Choices

45:12 Addressing Emotional Turmoil and Finding Alternative Coping Mechanisms

47:52 The Power of Self-Reflection and Finding Answers Within

49:34 Promoting a More Enjoyable and Mindful Christmas

50:03 Recommendation for Further Listening: Interview with Rory from One Year No Beer

50:40 Conclusion and Well Wishes

In this episode, Carol apologises for missing a previous podcast due to technical frustrations and feeling unwell.

She discusses her craving for chocolate and the challenges of resisting it.

The conversation then shifts to the topic of alcohol and Christmas, highlighting the mindset of indulgence during the holiday season.

Carol suggests exploring alcohol-free alternatives and making a plan to pace yourself.

She emphasizes the availability of non-alcoholic options in restaurants and pubs.

The episode concludes with a mention of an upcoming resource which will be available soon on her website "Ten Hacks to Drink Less Over the Holidays."

Takeaways

Resisting cravings can be challenging, especially when feeling down.

The holiday season often involves indulgence in alcohol and food.

Exploring alcohol-free alternatives can help reduce alcohol consumption.

Many establishments offer a variety of non-alcoholic options.

Want to get in touch with Carol?

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In this episode, host Carol initiates a candid exploration into our relationship with alcohol, using Annie Grace's framework of the four A's: Asleep, Aware, Awake, and Alive.

Carol invites listeners to reflect on their own drinking habits and identifies the various stages individuals may find themselves in.

Which A are you? It's SO important to know where you are on the spectrum to enable you to move forward when it comes to your drinking habits.

Join her as she unravels the unconscious patterns surrounding our drinking habits and guides us through a journey of self-awareness and transformation.

Introduction:

The four A's are introduced as mentioned in Annie Grace's book, "This Naked Mind": Asleep, Aware, Awake, and Alive.

  Asleep

Carol delves into the "Asleep" stage, where we unconsciously engage in drinking without questioning or being aware.

Questions are posed to the audience to determine if they find themselves in the "Asleep" stage, pouring a drink automatically without conscious decision.

The impact of routine and ingrained drinking habits is explored.

Aware

The "Awake" stage is introduced as a conscious realisation of drinking too much without a solution.

Carol emphasises the challenges of the "Awake" stage, including cognitive dissonance and societal stigma around excessive drinking.

The discussion touches on the grey area between habitual drinking and alcoholism, highlighting the importance of self-awareness.

Questions are posed to the audience to determine if they find themselves in the "Aware" stage, pouring a drink automatically without conscious decision.

  Awake

The "Awake" stage is further explored, discussing external influences, societal norms, and triggers that contribute to drinking habits.

Personal experiences with pub culture and socializing are shared to illustrate societal influences on drinking.

The limitations of approaches that focus solely on changing behaviour without addressing underlying issues are discussed.

Questions are posed to the audience to determine if they find themselves in the "Awake" stage, pouring a drink automatically without conscious decision.

  Alive

The transition to the "Alive" stage is introduced, where individuals become conscious of their drinking habits and capable of finding solutions.

Carol shares personal experiences of being in the "Alive" stage, highlighting the freedom and choices that come with it.

The financial and lifestyle benefits of being in the "Alive" stage are emphasized.

Carol encourages listeners to assess their position in the four A's.

Questions are posed to the audience to determine if they find themselves in the "Alive" stage, pouring a drink automatically without conscious decision.

Conclusion:

Carol concludes the podcast by encouraging listeners to reflect on their drinking habits and consider the potential impact on their future.

Did something resonate in today's episode?

Do you feel ready to move from the "Aware" stage of your drinking to the "Alive " stage?

Want to get in touch with Carol to talk about moving forward and start to take back control of your drinking?

You can email Carol here: carol@warriormumcoaching.com Follow her on socials here:

Episode Summary:

In this empowering episode, our guest Anthea, a rebel at heart, shares her remarkable journey to sobriety, breaking free from societal norms and discovering the strength within.

From navigating the societal pressure of drinking to finding unexpected joys in sobriety, she takes us through the transformative moments that led her to quit alcohol for good.

Introduction:

• Anthea introduces her rebellious journey to sobriety.

• Talks about societal expectations and the pressure to drink.

• Reflects on the struggles with moderation and the search for a sober lifestyle.

• Recommends insightful books like "Alcohol Explained" by William Porter and her pivotal book "Quit Like A Woman" by Holly Whitaker.

Discovering Empowerment:

• Anthea shares how climbing and pole fitness became her new social outlets.

• Embracing mornings without regret and finding fulfillment in daytime activities.

Facing Emotions Without Alcohol:

•   Acknowledges using alcohol as an emotional crutch.

•  Discusses the importance of sitting with emotions, finding support, and building a healthier relationship with herself.

Influence on Others:

• Anthea describes the impact on her social circle, including her Glaswegian father.

• Addresses the societal challenge of being a non-drinker.

Mindset Matters:

• Emphasizes the role of mindset in enjoying events without alcohol.

• Encourages listeners to view sobriety as an empowering choice rather than a deprivation.

Dreams and Milestones:

• Anthea shares experiences with drinking dreams.

• Celebrates being alcohol-free for 14 months and the positive impact on health and hormones.

Empowering Women:

• Anthea connects sobriety to supporting hormonal balance, particularly relevant for women.

• Encourages women to consider the significant impact of alcohol on overall health.

Advice for Aspiring Rebels:

• Anthea urges individuals to be brave, try sobriety, and discover its empowering effects.

• Addresses societal conventions and encourages listeners to challenge norms.

Rebel Anthea finishes encouraging everyone to break free from societal expectations and explore the transformative journey of empowered sobriety.

You can reach Anthea here:

In this episode, Carol reflects on her own experiences with alcohol, triggered by the sound of her bins being emptied.

The embarrassment of the noise reminded her of a time when she tried to keep her drinking habits a secret.

She shares a recent conversation she had with a volunteer at a mental health charity, highlighting how common excessive drinking is.

Key Points:

1. The Bin Man and the Embarrassment:

Carol recalls the embarrassment she felt when the noise of her bins being emptied exposed her drinking habits.

She emphasizes the social pressure to keep alcohol consumption a secret, especially when it becomes a significant part of one's routine.

2. Open Conversation about Alcohol:

As a mental health charity volunteer, Carol engages in a conversation about alcohol with a fellow volunteer and a participant of the charity's program.

The conversation prompts the volunteer to reflect on her own drinking habits, leading to a realization about potential health impacts.

3. Normalizing Excessive Drinking:

Carol reflects on how societal norms often lead people to underestimate the amount of alcohol they are drinking.

She shares her own routine, illustrating how what may seem normal in social settings can actually be excessive.

4. Awareness of Health Impact:

Carol discusses the health implications of alcohol, including its link to various health issues and its classification as a Class 1 carcinogen.

She emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and the need for open conversations about our drinking habits.

5. Recognizing the Signs:

Carol encourages listeners to reflect on their own drinking habits, especially if the noise of their bins being emptied triggers feelings of embarrassment.

She suggests that acknowledging the signs and having an open conversation can be the first step towards making positive changes.

6. Offer of Support:

Carol shares her email address for listeners who may want to discuss their drinking habits and explore the possibility of making positive changes.

 Conclusion:

Carol's candid reflection on her own experiences with alcohol serves as a reminder to listeners to assess their own drinking habits.

The episode encourages open conversations about alcohol consumption and emphasizes the importance of self-awareness for overall well-being.

Want to get in touch with Carol?

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Introduction:

The host starts by mentioning her recent networking experience with Sarah Cook's Come Network With Me group, emphasizing the value of networking for business women

1. Reflecting on Returning to Work After a Holiday:

• The host shares her thoughts on returning to work after a vacation.

• Discusses the challenges of being self-employed and self-motivated.

• Highlights the topic of self-discipline and avoiding procrastination.

2. Reconnecting with Dizzy Dog:

• The host shares her joy about reuniting with her beloved dog, Dizzy, after a break.

• Discusses the process of reaching out to the new owner and arranging dog walks.

3. Sobriety and the Temptations of Drinking:

• The host mentions "Sober October" and the struggles people face during this challenge.

• Talks about the desire to make up for lost drinking days in November.

• Reflects on her own experiences with alcohol cravings and indulgence.

4. The Importance of Self-Reflection:

• The host encourages listeners to reflect on their own drinking habits.

• Addresses the emotional and psychological aspects of alcohol consumption.

• Shares the importance of educating oneself about alcohol and its effects.

5. Tips for Those Struggling with their Alcohol Habit:

• Offers advice for those looking to take a break from alcohol.

• Recommends seeking resources, books, podcasts, and community support.

• Emphasizes the significance of making a plan and being prepared when socialising.

• Suggests strategies for handling questions about not drinking when in social situations.

6. The Power of Community and Accountability:

• Discusses the benefits of joining a supportive community when trying to change drinking habits.

• Stresses that knowledge is only powerful when put into practice.

• Encourages listeners to reach out with questions or challenges for future podcast episodes.

If you have returned to your old drinking patterns after a stretch away & looking for support. I have a new Power Hour Strategy Session £99. Spend an hour with me & leave with 3 practical steps you can take to make a positive change around your drinking habits.

Contact me via email or follow the link below to get in touch.

https://warriormum.kartra.com/page/WarriorMumContactForm

Want to get in touch with Carol?

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Introduction:

Hello, how you doing? Hope things are good with you. It's great to get back to podcasting after a three-week break.

Discussion:

The theme of this episode is "Feeling Guilty" and it's inspired by observations in sobriety and sober curious Facebook groups.

The host reads and reflects on comments from group members struggling with guilt and regret related to their drinking habits.

Shares personal experiences about how drinking patterns changed during parenthood and emotional challenges.

Discussion of the difficulty in changing habits that have been in place for years or even decades.

The host reflects on her own journey of trying to quit drinking and the importance of seeking support and knowledge.

Advises not to be too hard on yourself and the value of educating yourself about alcohol's effects.

The host suggests using the "Pause" technique to help understand your drinking patterns and make gradual changes.

Offers tips for parents who want to reduce their drinking and be present with their children.

Recommends awareness as a crucial step in making changes to drinking habits.

Suggests exploring alternatives to alcohol and learning about the effects of alcohol on sleep and well-being.

Mentions the importance of getting involved in supportive communities and resources like books and social groups.

Conclusion:

Encourages listeners to be gentle with themselves and understand that drinking an addictive substance is not their fault.

Explains the dopamine cycle and the reasons for chasing the "buzz."

Summarizes the advice to stop beating yourself up, get educated, and reach out for support.

Host's availability for further discussion and signs off with well wishes for the listeners.

Enjoyed the episode? Please leave me a review so more people will get the opportunity to listen. Thanks in advance. x

Want to get in touch with Carol?

Follow her on socials here:

I am away on my hols so no chat from me this week. Instead, I am delighted to share my guest appearance on Terri Pugh's podcast. Be sure to check Terri out on her socials. Links at the bottom of the show notes.

Here's what we share 😃

Why do people drink alcohol? To celebrate? To escape reality? Or to feel something else? Why do we turn to alcohol as a means to destress? And have you ever noticed you feel confident when you're drunk?

When you drink, the dopamine hit from alcohol becomes addictive, and the brain relies on it to feel good, leading to a cycle of dependence. In short, you feel good when you're drunk.

However, it is essential to note that alcohol only provides temporary confidence. It impairs decision-making and can have adverse effects on the brain and body.

But without alcohol, how can we gain confidence without relying on it? How can one improve self-acceptance and mindset?

In this week's episode, I'm very excited to welcome our special guest — Carol Urry.

She is an alcohol control coach specializing in working with mums of teenagers and young adults. She has over a decade of personal experience and understands the challenges and pressures that can lead to relying on alcohol to destress and relax at the end of the day.

We will discuss everything there is to know about the effects of alcohol on your health and family, address the emotional reasons for alcohol use, and provide tips on how to embody confidence from within without relying on alcohol.

Here are all our social links:

Terri’s Socials:

In this podcast episode, we have Ghulam Fernandes, a Grief Specialist, sharing her personal journey through grief and how it led her to help others dealing with similar challenges.

Ghulam starts by sharing a personal story of her struggle with grief after her mother's death. At that time, she didn't understand that grief could manifest in various ways, including self-soothing behaviours. In her case, it was comfort eating. For years, she battled with her weight and tried unsuccessfully to manage her eating habits, all because she hadn't yet realized the purpose behind these actions – a way to cover up the pain of loss.

As a teenager, Ghulam experienced hormonal changes alongside her grief, which further complicated her situation. But it wasn't until she connected her weight issues to unresolved grief that she began to find answers. Her journey through loss was profound, including the deaths of her mother, brother, sister, and father, as well as multiple miscarriages. These experiences, coupled with other life stresses and strains, piled onto her emotional burden.

Ghulam reflects on how people often resort to various coping mechanisms to deal with grief, such as binge-watching TV shows or seeking solace in fantasy worlds. She mentions that while these activities can provide temporary relief, they don't address the underlying pain and issues.

When it comes to seeking help for grief, Ghulam explains her approach. She offers a free guide called "The Five Key Steps in Handling Your Grief" and a discovery call to assess whether someone needs professional help. Finding a values match between the client and the specialist is crucial. Her grief program focuses on knowledge, tools, and processes for healing.

Regarding the duration of her program, Ghulam believes that around 12 weeks is optimal. An extended program not only helps clients maintain their progress but also provides ongoing support and accountability. She emphasizes the importance of investing time, energy, and finances in the full program to equip clients for lifelong coping.

Ghulam also touches on the significance of recognizing unresolved grief. Common signs include regrets, guilt, and disappointment. She shares a personal story of how she learned to communicate openly with her father before his death to avoid regrets. Ghulam's "going from grief to gratitude" process aims to help individuals address unresolved grief and improve their lives.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

This week I have my lovely fellow coach Kath Elliott sharing her story about her binge drinking & personal experience with breast cancer

Kath's story is an inspiring testament to the positive changes that can result from making mindful choices in life. Episode Highlights:

Kath discusses two defining moments that led her to reevaluate her relationship with alcohol.

She shares her realisation that binge drinking, even if not frequent, was causing problems in her life.

Kath describes her decision to join the Live July alcohol experiment with "This Naked Mind" and her journey towards an alcohol-free life.

The misconception that only daily drinkers have drinking problems is addressed.

Kath reflects on the cultural aspects that contributed to her binge drinking during her formative years.

She discusses the positive reinforcement she received for her ability to drink heavily and the negative consequences she experienced, including memory loss and regrettable behaviour.

Kath dispels the myth that her drinking habits were not problematic because they weren't weekly occurrences.

The importance of awareness regarding the link between alcohol consumption and breast cancer is emphasised.

Kath shares her breast cancer diagnosis and how it motivated her to research the connection between alcohol and breast cancer.

The lack of public health campaigns in Australia addressing the link between alcohol and breast cancer is highlighted.

Kath shares insights from her research on how even light to moderate drinking can increase breast cancer risk.

Sober October is just around the corner.

Instead of white knuckling your way through, visit my website & download my comprehensive 12 page guide to effortlessly sail through October. 🤩

In this episode, the discussion revolves around the upcoming Sober October and the intriguing concepts of willpower and decision fatigue.

Understanding Decision Fatigue

The podcast elaborates on decision fatigue, a psychological phenomenon wherein the capacity to make choices diminishes after numerous daily decisions. The accumulation of everyday decisions can render individuals susceptible to impulsive behaviour, particularly during the day's closing hours.

The Finite Nature of Willpower 

The podcast examines willpower as a finite resource, likening it to a battery that depletes over time. It references the commonly known "21-day habit" notion and the challenges associated with sustaining willpower for extended durations.

Decision Avoidance and Impulsivity 

The podcast explores how decision fatigue often leads to avoidance of decisions, with individuals preferring to maintain the status quo. It also delves into impulsive behaviors, such as late-night snacking, and their potential repercussions.

Irritability and Mental Effort 

The discussion addresses the irritability and mental exhaustion stemming from decision-making fatigue. It emphasizes the unsustainability of relying solely on willpower, especially concerning particular habits.

Encouraging Accountability and Charity Support

The podcast encourages its audience to explore resources related to Sober October and consider supporting charities dedicated to relevant causes. It underscores the importance of sponsorship and accountability in accomplishing goals and fostering positive changes.

Want to get in touch with Carol?

Follow her on socials here:

Carol shares her eventful week, marked by ups and downs, inviting listeners into her personal journey.

• The anticipation of an online conference, a networking group, and technical issues that derailed her plans.

• A heartfelt concern about her son's ADHD medication delay and the challenging situation it created.

• A disagreement with her spouse, emphasizing the realities of everyday life.

• Carol introduces the central theme: taking responsibility for our emotions and reactions, avoiding the blame game.

• The importance of viewing situations from different perspectives and gaining valuable insights.

• Carol's personal journey of learning to cope with challenging emotions and unhealthy coping mechanisms.

• The concept of self-soothing and sitting with uncomfortable feelings instead of suppressing them.

• Practical tools for managing emotions: self-reflection, self-talk awareness, and self-compassion.

• Encouragement for listeners to recognize their power in shaping their day and not letting external factors dictate their mood.

• The importance of recognizing the toxic impact of negative thoughts and the role of wisdom in decision-making.

• A call to choose positivity and self-regulated thoughts, highlighting the significance of personal choices.

• Carol's closing message underscores the power of self-awareness and personal responsibility in shaping our lives.

Please help to support me & leave me a review if you have enjoyed the episode.

If you would like to contact me please email: carol@warriormumcoaching.com

Want to follow me for more insights into our relationship with alcohol? See links below.

In this longer than usual episode, we take a leisurely stroll through the various aspects of our relationship with alcohol.

Introduction

Sometimes, we find ourselves trapped in routines that don't serve us well. Our lives can feel like we're stuck in a never ending cycle where escaping can be incredibly challenging. One habit that often keeps us stuck is our drinking.

Alcohol provides an artificial dopamine hit that we crave, much like the natural high we get from exercise, such as a walk in nature.

The Dopamine Hit

Alcohol's dopamine hit is intense and provides a temporary sense of relief and relaxation. This is why many of us drink, seeking that elusive buzz.

Some can moderate their drinking successfully, but others may find it difficult. It's crucial to consider the environment in which you drink and the associations we make with alcohol.

The Dark Side of Alcohol

The alcohol industry spends a staggering amount on advertising, promoting a product that is, at its core, ethanol—a substance we run our cars on!

Ethanol is a Class 1 carcinogen and is linked to various types of cancer, affecting our DNA. This realization can be a wake-up call for those who underestimate alcohol's health risks. I know it had a massive impact on me realising that it was a cancer causing substance!

Family History and Genetic Predisposition

Family history can play a role in our relationship with alcohol, but it's not the only factor. Environmental influences, upbringing, and social experiences also contribute to our drinking habits.

Recognising these influences can help us make more mindful choices regarding our drinking habits.

Moderation and Awareness

Moderation can be challenging, as our bodies will develop tolerance over time, requiring more alcohol to achieve the desired buzz.

The term "alcoholic" isn't precise; instead, we often find ourselves in the grey area of heavy drinking. Being mindful of the quantity and frequency of our drinking habit is crucial.

Financial and Health Implications

Alcohol can be financially draining. By taking a break or quitting, you can use the money you used to spend on alcohol to other rewarding activities or hobbies.

Quitting alcohol can lead to physical improvements like weight loss, better skin, and enhanced sleep quality. It can also improve cognitive functions and memory.

Hydration and Wellness

Alcohol dehydrates the body, and when we stop drinking, our cells have a chance to regain proper hydration.

A break from alcohol can lead to increased energy levels, better sleep, and improved overall well-being.

Conclusion and Call to Action

Remember, it's not your fault if you are struggling. Alcohol is addictive so give yourself some compassion and grace.

Take small steps towards change. Find some information you can relate to, connect with supportive communities, and consider alcohol alternatives.

Small changes can lead to significant transformations in your life. Embrace the potential for a brighter, healthier future.

If you're interested in learning more or have questions, feel free to reach out on the links below.

Remember – Nothing changes if nothing changes.

Want to get in touch with Carol?

Follow her on socials here: Please note I am no longer on TikTok.

Introduction:

In this episode, we delve into the complexities of relationships and drinking.

Carol & Charlene share personal experiences and reflections on the impact of alcohol on relationships, family dynamics, and personal well-being. From juggling responsibilities as parents to maintaining a healthy balance between self-care and partnership, we explore the challenges that arise when alcohol becomes a coping mechanism & how relationships are affected.

Episode Highlights:

• Discussing the stressors of parenting, especially with young children.
• The allure of using alcohol as a means to relax and de-stress.
• Navigating the struggle between partner time and personal time.
• Recognising the need for individual space and reflection.
• The importance of pouring into yourself before pouring into others.
• Acknowledging the effort required to sustain healthy relationships.
• Addressing the strain of managing work, family, and relationships.
• The risk of becoming disconnected and losing shared experiences.
• Unpacking the reasons for turning to alcohol to deal with unhappiness.
• Exploring cultural influences and societal norms around alcohol consumption.
• Reflecting on the consequences of using alcohol to escape stress.
• How excessive drinking affects communication and understanding.
• The toll on intimacy, sex life, and emotional connection.
• The risk of drifting apart due to one-sided focus and self-numbing.
• Recognising when alcohol consumption is problematic.
• The importance of reaching out for help and joining supportive communities.
• Overcoming defensiveness and embracing accountability for change.
• Understanding the ripple effect of excessive alcohol consumption on friends and family.
• Coping with the pain of watching someone harm themselves.
• Balancing concern and support without judgment.

It's essential to recognize the potential damage excessive drinking can have on relationships and seek help when needed, both for yourself and for the sake of those we care about. Charlene offers a free call to discuss any issues or challenges you are facing in your relationships.

You can contact Charlene on the link below & download her free pdf - 7 ways to connect with your spouse.

Introduction

Hey there! Welcome to another episode of Kicking Habits, I hope you're doing well and having a fantastic day, no matter when you're tuning in from. Today's episode is all about navigating those Bank Holiday weekends alcohol free.

So, I'm taking a leisurely walk while recording this episode because, you know, a little movement never hurt anyone. It's all about finding that balance, even though I have to admit that after thirteen years in the armed forces, exercise still isn't my favourite thing. I mean, exercise and I have a complicated relationship, kind of like my feelings towards certain beverages. But hey, staying active is part of the healthy lifestyle package, right?

Bank Holiday Vibes

Guess what? I’m recording this on the August Bank Holiday weekend, and I'm pretty excited about it. I've got a barbecue lined up on Monday, and the best part is, no one's planning on going overboard with the drinks. It's a 5 o'clock affair, and most folks will be driving, so I'm not expecting any wild party scenes. But what about you? Any special plans for the weekend? Let's get right into some tips to help you make the most of this break without regretting it later.

Tips for a Successful Bank Holiday

1. Prepare with Alternatives: If you're hitting a gathering, consider bringing along some non-alcoholic drink options. And if you're heading to a venue, scope out their non-alcoholic offerings. Trust me, it's a smart move to have alternatives ready.

2. Accountability Matters: Tell someone you trust that you're taking a break from alcohol this weekend. It's a game-changer when someone's in the loop, making it less likely for you to change your mind and opt for that drink.

3. Hold Your Drink Proudly: At social gatherings, make sure you've got a non-alcoholic drink in hand right from the start. It helps you avoid those awkward conversations about what you're drinking. Remember, not drinking is a valid choice!

4. Craft Your Response: Have a reason handy for why you're not drinking. Being the designated driver is a classic, but it could also be a health goal or simply a personal decision. Having a solid reason makes it easier to decline offers.

5. Subtle Substitutions: If temptation creeps in, opt for non-alcoholic alternatives and ask for it in fancy glasses. It's all about fitting in while making a choice that's right for you.

6. Change the Conversation: If people insist, don't hesitate to steer the conversation in another direction. Ask about their recent holiday, their kids, or even their job. Shifting the focus can make the alcohol topic fade away.

7. Plan for Success: Think about how you want to feel after the Bank Holiday. Wouldn't it be great to start your week feeling fresh, hangover-free, and full of energy? Keep that in mind as you make your choices.

So, whether you're already sipping on a boozy drink or thinking about joining in, remember, it's never too late to hit the reset button. You can start making healthier choices right now, and it doesn't have to wait until Monday or any other specific day. Bank holidays used to be my excuse for indulgence, but I've learned that making better choices keeps me feeling on top form!

It's important that everyone finds their own path when it comes to taking back control of their drinking.

In this episode, Sally shares her journey to recovery and sobriety through AA. She recalls her early exposure to alcohol at a young age and how she quickly developed a fascination with it. As she grew older, her drinking escalated, and she found herself immersed in the club scene, using substances to conceal her consumption. This ultimately led her down a path of addiction and alcoholism, where she felt the need to drink in order to function.

Sally delves into her experiences with different substances, including alcohol, marijuana, and cocaine, explaining how they impacted her behaviour and social interactions. She describes her efforts to fit in and feel a sense of importance within her social circles. She also discusses her struggles with anxiety, depression, and a complex relationship with faith and spirituality.

The turning point in Sally's story comes when she starts seeking help and enters recovery. She shares her experiences with therapy, outpatient programs, and Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). Sally walks us through the 12 steps of AA, highlighting the process of self-reflection, making amends, and seeking spiritual growth. She emphasizes the importance of a supportive community, sponsor relationships, and regular attendance at AA meetings.

In this week's episode, Carol dives into the world of alcohol, revealing its secrets and hidden truths. Carol challenge the conventional beliefs and stigma surrounding drinking habits, empowering listeners to explore a new perspective on this addictive substance.

Join Carol as she shares her dedication to a local charity where she offers a life-changing 30-day program. Discover the transformative power of a positive mindset shift in this eye-opening episode.

Intriguingly, Carol introduces "The Pause," a surprising technique that eases the pressure of giving up alcohol. Learn how embracing this pause can lead to deeper self-understanding and uncover the reasons behind your own drinking habits.

Through engaging insights and thought-provoking discussions, this podcast breaks down the barriers to sobriety. Find out the value of coaching and supportive communities in your journey to change, without judgment or labels.

Are you ready to take the first step towards a healthier relationship with alcohol? Unlock the secrets to lasting change then check out Carol's private Facebook group, "Kicking Habits," for exclusive resources and a supportive community. Click the link below.

Don't miss out on this empowering episode, designed to inspire curiosity and self-compassion. Tune in now to discover the path to freedom from alcohol's grip.

Alcohol amplified Coles struggles and pushed him further into darkness and depression.

He reflects on being the life of the party and pushing others to drink, driven by insecurities.

Over time, he realized he needed to break free from the prison of alcohol and prioritize his physical and mental well-being.

Cole shares his experience of continuing to socialise without alcohol and embracing a new way of life.

The fear of missing out (FOMO) and concern about others' opinions gradually became less important to him.

Journaling played a significant role in his recovery, allowing him to be brutally honest with himself and explore his inner self.

Cole highlights the importance of self-compassion, curiosity, and vulnerability in the journaling process.

He explains that he had already experienced the full spectrum of alcohol's effects and wasn't afraid of missing out on anything.

Cole encourages others to envision their future selves free from addiction and to be grateful for the decision to change.

He provides coaching services through his website, maps2meaning.com, and can be contacted via email. He is also active on Instagram. Please see links below.

Why is it such a challenge to take a break from drinking?

Many people ask me this question, and the answer lies in the intricate workings of our brain and the chemistry behind its signals and subconscious processes.

When I first decided to take a break from alcohol, I didn't intend to quit forever. I simply wanted to take a 30-day break and reassess. During that time, I immersed myself in books, podcasts, and communities related to alcohol. I became fascinated with the science behind it all, and this knowledge became the foundation of my coaching and educational approach.

I delved deep into various aspects around my drinking. I needed to understand why saying no to alcohol and relying on willpower alone always failed for me.

It led me to explore the different areas of our brain responsible for various emotions and behaviour's.

Our primitive brain, also known as the "lizard brain," is where our survival instincts and basic emotions live. It operates on instincts rather than rationality.

When we drink alcohol regularly for an extended period, our brain recognizes it as a necessary substance for survival. So, every time I reached for a glass of wine after work to unwind, I unknowingly reinforced to my subconscious that I needed it to relax.

Over time, this habitual behaviour became deeply ingrained, even to the point where my brain automatically associated driving home with alcohol at the end of the journey.

Our logical and rational brain, the prefrontal cortex would question this behaviour. It would remind me of my intentions to cut back or take a break. This internal battle created a state of cognitive dissonance, where the subconscious primitive brain would fear the absence of alcohol, while the logical brain tried to resist its whispers.

There is no shame in finding it difficult to control alcohol. It's important to understand that alcohol is an addictive substance, and with regular use, our brain becomes accustomed to it.

The instinctual nature of our brain, combined with the emotional attachment we develop, leads to irrational thinking and responses. The brain is just doing its job!

For a long time, I felt weak and frustrated because I couldn't control my drinking. I tried relying on willpower alone, but it was a waste of time. Eventually, I discovered that the power of education and awareness was key.

If you're looking to cut back or take a break from alcohol, I encourage you to educate yourself. Explore "quit lit," listen to podcasts, and join supportive communities. The abundance of resources available surprised me, and it's incredible how empowering knowledge can be. Check out my free download on my website to get started.

Throughout this journey, it's crucial to practice self-compassion and understanding. Alcohol is an addictive substance, and the brain's response to it is natural. Beating yourself up over past experiences or struggling to control your drinking isn't productive so be gentle with yourself.

Introduction:

Aunee shares her experience coming from an Asian background, where societal expectations and the pressure to maintain a perfect image are damaging. Despite being believed by everyone, that her uncle has sexually abused her she finds herself silenced and dismissed. Aunee expresses her desire to be seen and heard despite the struggles.

The Impact of Asian Society:

Aunee reflects on how Asian society enables perpetrators by failing to hold them accountable for their actions, be it domestic violence or sexual abuse. She finds it difficult to comprehend why her own family would continue to talk to the perpetrator, leaving her feeling betrayed and questioning her worth.

Escaping and Finding a Toxic Relationship:

In an attempt to distance herself from her family and the Asian culture she wanted no part of, Aunee enters into a relationship with someone, however, she soon realises that he is the wrong person. Despite red flags, Aunee blinds herself to the warning signs. Verbal abuse, physical harm, and feelings of worthlessness become the norm, as her self-esteem deteriorates further.

Parenthood and Struggles:

As a young mother, Aunee faces the challenges of raising her child while navigating a toxic relationship. She takes a year off from university and moves in with her boyfriend, becoming isolated from her family. The turbulent relationship, constant breakups, and makeups, and the strain on her studies lead Aunee to make the difficult decision of leaving university, sacrificing her education.

Alcohol as an Escape:

Feeling overwhelmed and wanting to escape herself and her trauma, Aunee turns to alcohol. Alcohol becomes her means of self-medication, providing temporary relief from her pain. She loses control over her drinking, and her need to escape becomes all-consuming. Aunee's relationship with alcohol intensifies over the years.

Rock Bottom and the Path to Recovery:

Aunee reaches a point where she can no longer manage herself, let alone care for her children. Understanding the detrimental impact of her addiction, she makes the responsible decision to hand her children over to their father for stability and support. Aunee's relationship with her children suffers, and they lose trust in her due to her repeated promises to change and subsequent relapses. This rock bottom moment prompts her to seek help.

Facing Trauma and Acceptance:

Recognizing the trauma, she has caused her children, Aunee realises that she has become the abuser, perpetuating the cycle of harm. This realisation is a harsh pill to swallow, but it fuels her determination to change. Aunee starts her rehabilitation programs that address her PTSD and confronts her past traumas head-on. Accepting her faults and understanding the connection between her addiction and trauma becomes a turning point in her recovery journey.

Life After Rehab:

Leaving rehab, Aunee faces the daunting challenge of re-entering the outside world. With newfound self-awareness and a sense of her strengths and weaknesses, she returns home to her family. There is fear and uncertainty, but Aunee is determined not to let herself down. She embraces accountability and takes responsibility for her recovery, committing to a life without alcohol.

Becoming a Peer Mentor and Advocate:

Aunee's transformative journey leads her to become a peer mentor for a local recovery network, specifically focusing on supporting Asian individuals. Through open and honest discussions about her own experiences, Aunee strives to mentor and inspire Asian women who may be facing similar struggles. Despite attempts from her family to silence her, she remains steadfast in speaking her truth and advocating for others.

Aunee's links:

Cravings and Resisting the Urge to Drink

Cravings can show up in different ways, both physically and mentally. It's important to recognize and understand these cravings to effectively resist the urge to drink.

Welcome to another episode of my podcast, where I dive deep into the world of self-talk and its incredible influence on our lives. Today, I'll explore the importance of being mindful of our inner dialogue and how it shapes our beliefs and experiences.

Episode Highlights:

• Cherishing the Beauty of Early Mornings: Rise and shine! Take a moment to bask in the beauty of a tranquil early morning and how it sets the tone for a positive mindset.

• Unleashing the True Power of Self-Talk: Let's dig into the concept of self-talk and uncover just how much it impacts our thoughts, actions, and overall well-being.

• The Awakening: Personal Development Journey: I'll share my own experience of how I became aware of my self-talk during my self-development journey, including coach training, and how it transformed my perspective.

• Challenging Society's Narrative on Alcohol: Let's question the societal beliefs surrounding alcohol and how our own beliefs may have been influenced by media and societal expectations.

• Decoding the Science Behind Perception: Get ready for a crash course in the brain's ability to process information and how our conscious and subconscious minds play a role in shaping our perceptions.

• The Intriguing World of Distorted Thinking: Discover the fascinating impact of distorted thinking patterns on our relationships and how they can lead to unnecessary stress and misunderstandings.

• Embracing Curiosity and Taking Positive Action: I'll share some practical strategies to help you become more aware of your self-talk, challenge negative thoughts, and take positive action for personal growth.

• The Power of Communication: Learn why open and honest communication can be a game-changer in preventing misunderstandings and strengthening relationships.

Take a moment to reflect on the power of your self-talk and how it influences your daily life. Remember, you have the ability to reshape your inner narrative and cultivate a more positive and empowering mindset. So, let's embark on this journey together, one step at a time. Stay tuned for my next episode, where I'll continue exploring inspiring topics to help you change your mindset & break those habits.

Take care and remember to embrace the beauty that surrounds you. Until next time.

Recommended books:

🎙️In this episode Carol discuss the concept of moderation and how it relates to alcohol consumption.

🎙️How moderation depends on an individual's relationship with alcohol.

🎙️Carol shares her personal experience of trying to moderate her drinking for about a decade.

🎙️Why decision fatigue plays a role in the difficulty of moderation.

🎙️The impact of tolerance on moderation is discussed, and I share my own experience with needing larger quantities of alcohol to feel its effects.

🎙️How alcohol affects the prefrontal cortex, impairing decision-making abilities.

🎙️The artificial dopamine hit provided by alcohol is explored, along with the body's craving for more.

🎙️When wanting more alcohol, it’s not a sign of weakness, but rather a result of the addictive nature of the substance.

🎙️Carol recommends taking a break from drinking to allow the body to reset and suggests using that time to educate yourself about alcohol and sobriety.

🎙️Carol suggests joining community groups, reading books, and listening to podcasts focused on sober curiosity and mindful drinking, encouraging listeners 🎙️to apply the knowledge they gain through education and emphasizes the power of putting it into practice.

Here are some links to the books mentioned in this episode:

Gordon and Stella were my two best friends for many years and I don't know if you've ever had a time when you were at work or something's happened and you're just like, I just need to get with my two best friends.

I look back on my life, interestingly enough, alcohol and I had an incident when I was 15.

I suppose my drinking really began as a kid because it was part of being part of a community, part of the family.

But what started to happen, it started to be this rift between me and my husband. He needed help. I didn't know how to help him.

I stopped going out a lot and I think this is really where you start to realise that there's a big problem.

I'd wake up in the morning and literally in sheer terror, I'd have to run through the night to try and remember what I might have said or who I might have offended.

I would hide the phone. And I would hide it in my room. And she'd be hammering on my door at two o'clock in the morning.

I really had no idea what on earth I'd done. And that panic, I did not want to feel. So I walked out of that hotel and made it as best as I could. And I just said to my husband on the phone, I said, I have give up drinking as of today.

I don't regret anything I did in my life. I think it brought me to the person that I am.

In this episode, we are going to focus on tactics and on things that you can do proactively when stressful things come up in your life.

When you think about stress as being something that's harmful, it actually shuts you down. It just wants to protect you. Which is when you are most likely to reach for something to numb out with, such as alcohol.

When your mind is racing, you can start to beat yourself up. And get really annoyed at yourself if you've made a mistake or feeling guilty or ashamed about something. And that's when you want to reach for a drink.

If you decide to runaway from the stress, your mind just reinforces. That you can't deal with it and you're not strong enough.

It's important to acknowledge the stress and accept it.

There is always a way to work it out.

Follow me on my socials:

Is stress good for us or bad for us?

Its all about perception & how you see stress.

Your brain can’t tell the difference between reality & something that’s made up when it comes to your thoughts.

Stress can be used to get things done in a positive way.

We can be programmed to avoid stress at all costs.

Some stress can help us to learn & grow.

I have lots of gold medals for failing in my sobriety.

We can learn from our stress.

Distracting yourself is not you dealing with the underlying issues.

Part 1

Stress is something we all have to deal with.

If we don’t learn how to deal with it or manage the stress or uncomfortable things in our lives we can turn to alcohol.

Why can one person control their drinking & another one can’t?

You have a drink for the very first time & ‘All the lights go on’ & you get that alive for the very first time feeling.

Maybe you use alcohol to give you that lift?

If you are pushing those feelings down & numbing out you are numbing the good as well as the bad.

The brain quickly realises that the alcohol numbs out the stress & it likes that.

Alcohol gives us a massive artificial dopamine hit.

We get to a point where we not only want alcohol we need it.

We all have to find what works for us addiction is addiction.

There are lots of things to relieve stress other than drinking.